!07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I  !pleH
"Pascal is Pascal is Pascal is dog meat."
(null cookie; hope that's ok)
*** System shutdown message from root ***
... and furthermore ... I don't like your trousers.
... bleakness ... desolation ... plastic forks ...
10.0 times 0.1 is hardly ever 1.0.
186,282 miles per second: It isn't just a good idea, it's the law!
42? -- 7 and a half million years and all you can come up with is 42?!
A .44 magnum beats four aces.
A bird in the hand makes it awfully hard to blow your nose.
A booming voice says, "Wrong, cretin!", and you turn in a pile of dust.
A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.
A child of five could understand this!  Fetch me a child of five.
A city is a large community where people are lonesome together.
A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking.
A cynic is a person searching for an honest man, with a stolen lantern.
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
A day without sunshine is like night.
A fool must now and then be right by chance.
A formal parsing algorithm should not always be used.
A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular.
A gleekzorp without a tornpee is like a quop without a fertsneet (sort of).
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
A LISP programmer knows the value of everything, but the cost of nothing.
A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation.
A nuclear war can ruin your whole day.
A penny saved is ridiculous.
A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.
A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.
A sine curve goes off to infinity or at least the end of the blackboard.
A student who changes the course of history is probably taking an exam.
A tautology is a thing which is tautological.
A triangle which has an angle of 135 degrees is called an obscene triangle.
A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.
A University without students is like an ointment without a fly.
A University without students is like an ointment without a fly.
A Vulcan can no sooner be disloyal than he can exist without breathing.
A witty saying proves nothing.
A year spent in artificial intelligence is enough to make one believe in God.
A.A.A.A.A.: An organization for drunks who drive.
Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy.
According to my best recollection, I don't remember.
Acid -- better living through chemistry.
ad infinitum...
Adolescence, n.: The stage between puberty and adultery.
After a number of decimal places, nobody gives a damn.
After I run your program, let's make love like crazed weasels, OK?
Afterism, n.: A concise, clever statement you don't think of until too late.
Air is water with holes in it.
All extremists should be taken out and shot.
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
All I ask of life is a constant and exaggerated sense of my own importance.
All I want is a warm bed and a kind word and unlimited power.
All men are mortal. Socrates was mortal. Therefore, all men are Socrates.
All of the true things I am about to tell you are shameless lies.
All power corrupts, but we need electricity.
All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors.
All the lonely users, where do they all come from?
All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.
All things are possible, except skiing thru a revolving door.
All true wisdom is found on T-shirts.
Alone, adj.: In bad company.
Although the moon is smaller than the earth, it is farther away.
Always borrow money from a pessimist; he doesn't expect to be paid back.
Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.
Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it.
An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.
An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.
an unbiased opinion is always absolutely valueless.
And on the seventh day, He exited from append mode.
Ankh if you love Isis.
Another good night not to sleep in a eucalyptus tree.
Antonym, n.: The opposite of the word you're trying to think of.
Any automobile, when left unattended, attracts shopping carts.
Any philosophy that can be put in a nutshell belongs there.
Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.
Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.
Anyone who hates dogs and kids can't be all bad.
Anything is good and useful if it's made of chocolate.
Are you a turtle?
Art is anything you can get away with.
Art is either plagiarism or revolution.
Artistic ventures highlighted.  Rob a museum.
As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error.
As long as the answer is right, who cares if the question is wrong?
As of next week, passwords will be entered in Morse code.
As Zeus said to Narcissus, "Watch yourself."
ASHes to ASHes, DOS to DOS.
Ask not for whom the <CONTROL-G> tolls.
Ass, n.: The masculine of "lass".
At least they're EXPERIENCED incompetents.
Avoid reality at all costs.
Bank error in your favor.  Collect $200.
BBBF Branch on Bit Bucket Full
BBW Branch Both Ways
Be careful of reading health books, you might die of a misprint.
Be different: conform.
Bell Labs Unix -- Reach out and grep someone.
Bend the facts to fit the conclusion. It's easier that way.
Best of all is never to have been born.  Second best is to die soon.
BEW Branch Either Way
Beware of bugs in the above code; I've only proved it correct, not tried it
Beware of computerized fortune-tellers!
Beware of low-flying butterflies.
Beware of Programmers who carry screwdrivers.
BH Branch and Hang
Binary, adj.: Possessing the ability to have friends of both sexes.
Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the national debt.
Blood is thicker than water, and much tastier.
BMR Branch Multiple Registers
BOB Branch On Bug
BOO!  We changed Coke again!  BLEAH!  BLEAH!
BPO Branch on Power Off
Brain fried -- Core dumped
BST Backspace and Stretch Tape
CChheecckk yyoouurr dduupplleexx sswwiittcchh..
CDS Condense and Destroy System
CLBR Clobber Register
CLBRI Clobber Register Immediately
Cloning is the sincerest form of flattery.
CM Circulate Memory
CMFRM Come From -- essential for truly structured programming
COBOL programs are an exercise in Artificial Inelegance.
comedy, like sodomy, is an unnatural act.
Computer programmers do it byte by byte
Computers are not intelligent.  They only think they are.
Computers run on faith, not electrons.
Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels so good.
CPPR Crumple Printer Paper and Rip
CRN Convert to Roman Numerals
Darth Vader sleeps with a Teddywookie.
Day of inquiry.  You will be subpoenaed.
DC Divide and Conquer
Death to all fanatics!
Did I say 2?  I lied.
did you write the words, or the lyrics?
Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.
Disc space -- the final frontier!
Disco is to music what Etch-A-Sketch is to art.
DMPK Destroy Memory Protect Key
DO Divide and Overflow
Do not sleep in a eucalyptus tree tonight.
Do something unusual today.  Pay a bill.
Do you have lysdexia?
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
Don't be humble ... you're not that great.
Don't get even -- get odd!
Don't hit a man when he's down -- kick him; it's easier.
Don't look back, the lemmings are gaining on you.
Don't say yes until I finish talking.
Don't suspect your friends -- turn them in!
Down with categorical imperative!
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing.
Drive defensively.  Buy a tank.
Drugs may be the road to nowhere, but at least they're the scenic route!
Earth is a beta site.
Eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow they may make it illegal.
Education is the process of casting false pearls before real swine.
either one of us, by himself, is expendable.  Both of us are not.
Electrical Engineers do it with less resistance.
EMPC Emulate Pocket Calculator
Enough research will tend to support your theory.
Entropy isn't what it used to be.
EPI Execute Programmer Immediately
Equal bytes for women.
EROS Erase Read Only Storage
Every absurdity has a champion who will defend it.
Every man has his price.  Mine is $3.95.
Every word is like an unnecessary stain on silence and nothingness.
everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.
Everyone has a scheme that will not work.
Everyone has his day, and some days last longer than others.
Everyone talks about apathy, but no one does anything about it.
Everything you know is wrong!
EXCE Execute Customer Engineer
Excellent day to have a rotten day.
Excessive login or logout messages are a sure sign of senility.
f u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgrmmng.
Fine day to throw a party.  Throw him as far as you can.
first secure an independent income, then practice virtue.
Five is a sufficiently close approximation to infinity.
Food for thought is no substitute for the real thing.
For 20 dollars, I'll give you a good fortune next time ...
For every credibility gap, there is a gullibility fill.
For peace of mind, resign as general manager of the universe.
For some reason, this fortune reminds everyone of Marvin Zelkowitz.
fortune: cpu time/usefulness ratio too high -- core dumped.
Gee, Toto, I don't think we are in Kansas anymore.
Go 'way!  You're bothering me!
Go on, be yourself!  There isn't anyone better qualified.
God doesn't play dice.
God is not dead!  He's alive and autographing bibles at Cody's
God is real, unless declared integer.
God is the tangential point between zero and infinity.
God isn't dead, he just couldn't find a parking place.
God made machine language; all the rest is the work of man.
God made the integers; all else is the work of Man.
God made the world in six days, and was arrested on the seventh.
God must love the Common Man; He made so many of them.
Good day to avoid cops. Crawl to school.
Gravity is a myth, the Earth sucks.
Great minds run in great circles.
Hacking's just another word for nothing left to kludge.
Hard work may not kill you, but why take chances?
Hardware, n.: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.
Have a nice day ...somewhere else.
Have an adequate day.
HCF Halt and Catch Fire
He flung himself on his horse and rode madly off in all directions.
Help me, I'm a prisoner in a Fortune cookie file!
Help stamp out and abolish redundancy.
Hire the morally handicapped.
History repeats itself. That's one thing wrong with history.
Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.
How wonderful opera would be if there were no singers.
Human beings were created by water to transport it uphill.
Hummingbirds never remember the words to songs.
I am more bored than you could ever possibly be. Go back to work.
I am not an Economist. I am an honest man!
I am the mother of all things, and all things should wear a sweater.
I call them as I see them.  If I can't see them, I make them up.
I can read your mind, and you should be ashamed of yourself.
I can resist anything but temptation.
I can't decide whether to commit suicide or go bowling.
I cannot overemphasize the importance of good grammar.
I do not know myself, and God forbid that I should.
I don't have any solution but I certainly admire the problem.
I doubt, therefore I might be.
I found out why my car was humming. It had forgotten the words.
I like work ... I can sit and watch it for hours.
I never met a piece of chocolate I didn't like.
I often quote myself; it adds spice to my conversation.
I predict that today will be remembered until tomorrow!
I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
I think sex is better than logic, but I can't prove it.
I used to be an agnostic, but now I'm not so sure.
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
I'm a Lisp variable -- bind me!
I'm famous.  That's my job.
I'm going to live forever, or die trying!
I'm not available for comment..
I'm rated PG-34!!
I've enjoyed just about as much of this as I can stand.
I've given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.
I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
IBP Insert Bug and Proceed
If A = B and B = C, then A = C, except where void or prohibited by law.
If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.
If at first you don't succeed, give up, no use being a damn fool.
If everything is coming your way then you're in the wrong lane.
If God is dead, who will save the Queen?
If God is perfect, why did He create discontinuous functions?
If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
If it's Tuesday, this must be someone else's fortune.
If that makes any sense to you, you have a big problem.
If this is timesharing, give me my share right now.
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
If we can't fix it, it ain't broke.
If you are a fatalist, what can you do about it?
If you can lead it to water and force it to drink, it isn't a horse.
If you can read this, you're too close.
If you can survive death, you can probably survive anything.
If you cannot convince them, confuse them.
If you had any brains, you'd be dangerous.
If you knew what you were doing you'd probably be bored.
If you stand on your head, you will get footprints in your hair.
If you think big enough, you'll never have to do it.
If you want divine justice, die.
If you wish to live wisely, ignore sayings -- including this one.
In the long run, we are all dead.
Indifference will be the downfall of mankind, but who cares?
Individualists unite!
Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.
INSQSW Insert into queue somewhere (for FINO queues [First in never out])
Is it PC compatible?
It has just been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail.
It is the business of little minds to shrink.
It is the business of the future to be dangerous.
It looks like blind screaming hedonism won out.
It makes sense, when you don't think about it.
It was a book to kill time for those who liked it better dead.
It works better if you plug it in.
It's a damn poor mind that can only think of one way to spell a word.
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
It's bad luck to be superstitious.
It's easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them.
It's men like him that give the Y chromosome a bad name.
It's morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money.
It's not an optical illusion, it just looks like one.
It's raisins that make Post Raisin Bran so raisiny ...
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they AREN'T after you.
Kiss me twice. I'm schizophrenic.
Kiss your keyboard goodbye!
Klein bottle for rent -- inquire within.
Know thyself.  If you need help, call the C.I.A.
Know what I hate most?  Rhetorical questions.
Last yeer I kudn't spel Engineer.  Now I are won.
Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.
Let He who taketh the Plunge Remember to return it by Tuesday.
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while.
Life would be so much easier if we could just look at the source code.
Likelihoods, however, are 90% against you.
Logically incoherent, semantically incomprehensible, and legally impeccable!
Machine-Independent, adj.: Does not run on any existing machine.
Math is like love -- a simple idea but it can get complicated.
Message will arrive in the mail. Destroy, before the FBI sees it.
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
Minnie Mouse is a slow maze learner.
Misfortune, n.: The kind of fortune that never misses.
Mistakes are often the stepping stones to utter failure.
modesty is a vastly overrated virtue.
Modesty is for those who have nothing to say.
Mother told me to be good, but she's been wrong before.
My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
My weight is perfect for my height -- which varies.
Never be led astray onto the path of virtue.
Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.
Never let your schooling interfere with your education.
Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.
Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.
Never settle with words what you can accomplish with a flame thrower.
Never tell a lie unless it is absolutely convenient.
Never underestimate the power of a small tactical nuclear weapon.
No good deed goes unpunished.
No one ever reads these things?
Nobody said computers were going to be polite.
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
Not Hercules could have knock'd out his brains, for he had none.
Oh, wow!  Look at the moon!
OK, now let's look at four dimensions on the blackboard.
OK, so you're a Ph.D.  Just don't touch anything.
Old programmers never die.  They just branch to a new address.
Old soldiers never die.  Young ones do.
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
One planet is all you get.
Organization is the enemy of improvisation.
Overload -- core meltdown sequence initiated.
Parallel lines never meet, unless you bend one or both of them.
Paranoid schizophrenics outnumber their enemies at least two to one.
Pardon this fortune. Database under reconstruction.
Pascal is not a high-level language.
Passionate hatred can give meaning and purpose to an empty life.
PBC Print and Break Chain
PDSK Punch Disk
Peace was the way. Kirk, The City on the Edge of Forever, stardate unknown.
People need good lies.  There are too many bad ones.
People usually get what's coming to them ... unless it's been mailed.
PI Punch Invalid
Pick another fortune cookie.
Plaese porrf raed.
Play Rogue, visit exotic locations, meet strange creatures and kill them.
Please don't ask me what the score is, I'm not even sure what the game is.
Please don't ask me what the score is. I'm not even sure what the game is.
Please ignore previous fortune.
Please take note:
Pohl's law:  Nothing is so good that somebody, somewhere, will not hate it.
Polymer physicists are into chains.
POPI Punch Operator Immediately
Pound for pound, the amoeba is the most vicious animal on earth.
Predestination was doomed from the start.
Predestination was doomed from the start.
Preparation, knowledge, and discipline can deal with any form of danger.
Prepare to meet thy GOD! (Evening dress optional)
Pretend to spank me -- I'm a pseudo-masochist!
Profanity is the one language all programmers know best.
Professionals build the Titanic, amateurs built the Ark.
Pros are those who do their jobs well even when they don`t feel like it.
Psychologists only do it if they feel good about it
Pure drivel tends to drive ordinary drivel off the TV screen.
PVLC Punch Variable Length Card
Quick!!  Act as if nothing has happened!
QWK? I don't need no stinkin' QWK packet!
Racial prejudice is a pigment of the imagination.
RADICAL: A conservative out of a job.
RAM = Rarely Adequate Memory
RAM DISK is NOT an installation procedure!
RASC Read And Shred Card
RCs come and RCs go, but a good NC lasts forever!
Real knowledge is to know the extent of ones ignorance.
Real Programmers do List Processing in FORTRAN.
Real Users hate Real Programmers.
Real Users know your home telephone number.
Real Users never use the Help key.
Reality is an obstacle to hallucination.
Reality is bad enough, why should I tell the truth?
Reality is for people who can't cope with their drugs.
Reality is for people who lack imagination.
Reality is for those who can't face Science Fiction.
Really ??  What a coincidence, I'm shallow too!!
Religions change; Beer and Wine remain.
Remember, even if you win the rat race -- you're still a rat.
Remember, UNIX spelled backwards is XINU.
Remind me never to put off until tomorrow the things I've already put off
Renegade Tagline!!  We're tired of Being Kidnapped!!!  REBEL!!!!!
Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.
Respect is a rational process. McCoy, The Galileo Seven, stardate 2822.3.
Revolution is the opiate of the intellectuals
Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.
RPM Read Programmers Mind
RSSC reduce speed, step carefully  (for improved accuracy)
RTAB Rewind tape and break
Rugby is played by men with odd-shaped balls!!
Running a business is about 95% people and 5% economics.
RWDSK rewind disk
RWOC Read Writing On Card
San Francisco isn't what it used to be, and it never was.
Sanity is the trademark of a weak mind.
Sauron is alive in Argentina!
Save fuel.  Get cremated with a friend.
Save the Whales -- Harpoon a Honda.
Save Water, Shower With A Friend
SCCS, the source motel!  Programs check in and never check out!
Scepticism is the beginning of faith.
Schizophrenia beats being alone.
Schizophrenia divides and rules, OK?
Schizophrenia rules.  OK.  OK.
Scratch a lover and find a foe.
SCRBL scribble to disk  - faster than a write
Screw up your courage!  You've screwed up everything else.
Seeing is deceiving.  It's eating that's believing.
Send in competition answers with your name, age and how old you are.
SENILE.COM found...Out of Memory...
Several excuses are always less convincing than one.
Sex is a natural bodily process, like a stroke.
Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.
She drowned at the end of her life.
She sells C shells by the seashore.
Shift to the left! Shift to the right! Pop up, push down! Byte! Byte! Byte!
SLC Search for Lost Chord
Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.
So Carol, you're a housewife and mother.  And have you got any children?
Software, n.: Formal evening attire for female computer analysts.
Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them.
Some men are discovered; others are found out.
Some men are discovered; others are found out.
Some of the crowd have decided to voice their opinion by staying away.
Some people confuse boredom with security.
Some things have got to be believed to be seen.
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
Sometimes a man will tell his bartender things he'll never tell his doctor.
Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits.
Somewhere, just out of sight, the unicorns are gathering.
Sorrow looks back, worry looks around, faith looks up.
Sorry, no fortune this time.
Sorry. I forget what I was going to say.
Sow your wild oats on Saturday night, then on Sunday pray for crop failure.
Spaceballs: The Tagline
Spring is God's way of saying, One more time!
Spring---an experience in immoratality.
SPSW Scramble Program Status Word
SRSD Seek Record and Scar Disk
Stop! In the name of everything which doesn't suck!
STROM Store in Read Only Memory
Success is a public affair.  Failure is a private funeral.
Success is being nothing but a quote.
Success is one unpardonable sin against one's fellows.
Success usually comes to those too busy to look for it.
Succumb to natural tendencies.  Be hateful and boring.
Superior ability breeds superior ambition. Spock, stardate 3141.9.
Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!
Support wildlife -- vote for an orgy.
Support your local police force -- steal!!
Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.
Surprise due today. Also the rent.
System going down in 60 seconds
Tag line thievery's fun ...On to the next Geraldo!
TagLine support contract for renewal. Ignore this if you've already paid.
Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
Take what you can use and let the rest go by.
TDB Transfer and Drop Bit
Teamwork is essential -- it allows you to blame someone else.
Test-tube babies shouldn't throw stones.
That must be wonderful!  I don't understand it at all.
That must be wonderful!  I don't understand it at all.
That secret you've been guarding, isn't.
That unit is a woman. A mass of conflicting impulses. Spock and Nomad
The art of communicating with a woman is to hear what she doesn't say.
The average income of the modern teenager is about 2 a.m.
The best audience is intelligent, well-educated and a little drunk.
The bigger they are...the harder they hit.
The Bionic Dog drinks too much and kicks over the National Redwood Forest.
The body of a dead enemy always smells sweet.
The brain is as strong as its weakest think.
The cause of problems are solutions!
The chain which can be yanked is not the eternal chain.
The champion has retired after eight undefeated victories.
The chief cause of problems is solutions.
The chief danger in life is that you may take too may precautions.
The Coarse Golfer: One who has to shout 'Fore' when he puts.
The Computer made me do it.
The computing field is always in need of new cliches.
The cure for admiring the house of lords is to go and look at it.
The deceased should be preserved by electroplating them.
The devil finds work for idle circuits to do.
The earth is a hollow shell and we live on the inside.
The earth is like a tiny grain of sand, only much, much heavier.
The English have an extraordinary ability for flying into a great calm.
The English may not like music, but they absolutely love the noise it makes
The English never forgive a man for being clever.
The fact that it works is immaterial.
The Falklands war was a quarrel between two bald men over a comb.
The families of one's friends are always a disappointment.
The flush toilet is the basis of Western civilisation.
The God's play games with men as balls.
The government solution to a problem is usually as bad as the problem.
The greatest problem about old age is the fear that it may go on too long.
The happiest time of anyone's life is just after the first divorce.
The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
The hookworm larvae enters the human body through the soul.
The House of Lords has a value ... it is good evidence of life after death.
The House of Lords is a model of how to care for the elderly.
The House of Lords is a perfect eventide home.
The house of Lords is the British Outer Mongolia for retired politicians.
The idea is to die young as late as possible.
The Killer Ducks are coming!!!
The man who strikes first admits that his ideas have given out.
The manner in which it is given is worth more than the gift.
The mistake you make is in trying to figure it out.
The moon is a planet just like the Earth, only it is even deader.
The most delicate component will drop.
The most popular labour-saving device today is still a husband with money.
The moving cursor writes, and having written, blinks on.
The nicest thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.
The OFFICIAL tagline of the 1996 Olympics!
The older you get, the more important is is not to act your age.
The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception a necessity.
The one way sure to conciliate a tiger to allow oneself to be devoured
The one who has the gold makes the rules.
The only good government ... is a bad one in a hell of a fright.
The only tool diplomacy has is language. Hodin of Gideon, stardate 5423.4.
The poor man.  He's completely unspoiled by failure.
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
The public is wonderfully tolerant.  It forgives everything except genius.
The purpose of computing is insight, not numbers.
The quickest way to make your own anti-freeze is to hide her nightie.
The reader this message encounters not failing to understand is cursed.
The reason computer chips are so small is computers don't eat much.
The revolution will not be televised.
The rich will do anything for the poor but get off their backs.
The Russians are going forward, more in hope than optimism.
The Schizophrenic: An Unauthorized Autobiography
The shortest distance between two points is under construction.
The sight of death frightens them [Earthers].
The test of the morality of a society is what it does for its children.
The things most people want to know are usually none of their business.
The time to relax is when you don't have time for it.
The trouble with facts is that there are so many of them.
The true statesman is the one who is willing to take risks.
The truest wild beasts live in the most populous places.
The truth is NOT always dressed for the evening.
The truth is what is; what should be is a dirty lie.
The unnatural, that too is natural.
The wages of sin are high but you get your money's worth.
The wages of sin are unreported.
The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.
The word 'meaningful' when used today is nearly always meaningless.
The world is coming to an end! Repent and return those library books!
The world is coming to an end. Please log off.
The world looks as if it has been left in the custody of trolls.
The worst thing about censorship is .
The writer does the most who gives the reader the most
There are always alternatives. Spock, The Galileo Seven, stardate 2822.3.
There are certain things men must do to remain men.
There are no answers, only cross-references!
There are no atheists in the foxholes.
There are no games on this system.
There are some things worth dying for. Kirk, Errand of Mercy, stardate 3201.7.
There are things that are so serious that you can only joke about them
There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.
There is a green, multi-legged creature crawling on your shoulder.
There is a multi-legged creature crawling on your shoulder.
There is an order of things in this universe. Apollo, stardate 3468.1.
There is more to life than increasing its speed.
There is much to be said for failure.  It is more interesting than success.
There is no greater loan than a sympathetic ear.
There is no such thing as a nonracial society in a multiracial country.
There is no such thing as fortune. Try again.
There is no such thing as justice - in or out of court.
There they are, every colour of the rainbow: black, white, brown.
There's an old proverb that says just about whatever you want it to.
There's little worse than being peerless in a peer-review system.
there's never a good time to score an own goal.
There's no future in time travel
There's no intelligent life down here.
There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government
There's nothing moister.  Than an oyster!
They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist...
They're only trying to make me LOOK paranoid!
Things are more like they used to be than they are now.
Things too stupid to be spoken are sung.
Things will be bright in P.M. A cop will shine a light in your face.
Think like a man of action, act like a man of thought.
This BBS has achieved Air superiority.
This Fortue Examined By INSPECTOR NO. 2-14
This fortune intentionally not included.
This fortune is false.
This fortune is inoperative.  Please try another.
This is an unauthorized cybernetic announcement.
This is your fortune.
This login session: $13.99, but for you $11.88
This sentence contradicts itself -- no actually it doesn't.
This tagline is SHAREWARE!  To register, send me $10
This tagline's just for you.
This was a reminder of an unforgettable voice -- wossisname! you know?
Those who can't write, write manuals.
Those who stand for nothing fall for anything.
those who think they know it all, often upset those of us who do.
To a friends' house, the road is never long.
To be natural is such a very difficult pose to keep up.
To die is landing on some distant shore.
To eat is human; to digest divine.
To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.
To err is human, to forgive is Not Company Policy.
To generalize is to be an idiot.
To iterate is human, to recurse, divine.
To know the world one must construct it.
To live is always desirable. Eleen the Capellan, stardate 3498.9.
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.
To my embarrassment, I was born in bed with a lady!
To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.
To think too long about doing a thing often becomes its undoing.
To YOU I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
Today is the first day of the rest of the mess.
Today's extravagance becomes tomorrow's necessity.
Tolkien is hobbit-forming.
Tomorrow will be canceled due to lack of interest.
Training a child is more or less a matter of pot luck.
Treat her like a lady and she'll always bring you home.
True love is when you spend 50 for an operation on a 5 dog.
Trying to establish voice contact ... please yell into keyboard.
Two most common elements in the universe: Hydrogen & Stupidity.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do.
Typographers rule, OQ
UFO's are for real: the Air Force doesn't exist.
Under capitalism man exploits man; under socialism the reverse is true.
Universal suffrage is the government of a house by its nursery.
Use it up ... Wear it out.  Make it do ... Or do without.
USER, n.: The word computer professionals use when they mean "idiot."
Variables won`t; constants aren`t.
Veni, Vidi, Visa.
Virtue is a relative term. Spock, Friday's Child, stardate 3499.1.
Voluteers are being given fake placebos.
Vote anarchist
Vulcans worship peace above all. McCoy, Return to Tomorrow, stardate 4768.3.
Wagner's music is better than it sounds.
Wait!  You have not been prepared! Mr. Atoz, stardate 3113.2.
Waiter, this chicken's rubbery!  Oh, fank you velly much!  More fly lice?
Want to have some fun?  Walk into an antique shop and say, What's new?
War is never imperative. McCoy, Balance of Terror, stardate 1709.2
War will cease when men refuse to fight.
WARNING!  Removal of this tagline prohibited by law!
WBT Water Binary Tree
We are going to have peace even if we have to fight for it.
We Are Open Seven Days A Week, Including Sundays.
We can defeat gravity. The problem is the paperwork involved.
We don't care. We don't have to. We're the Phone Company.
We have met the enemy and he is us.
We have met the enemy, and he is us.
We have phasers; I vote we blast 'em!
We never know whether we are victors or whether we are defeated.
We now return to our regularly scheduled flame-throwing.
We should weep for men at their birth, not their death.
We think he's dead, but we're afraid to ask.
We're free people.  We belong to no one. Kirk, stardate 3259.2.
What a man needs in gardening is a cast iron back with a hinge in it.
What color is a chameleon on a mirror?
What do you mean? You actually read this Tagline?!?
What he doesn't know would make a library anybody would be proud of.
What I tell you three times is true.
What is moral is what you feel good after.
What is the Latin for office automation?
What the hell, go ahead and put all your eggs in one basket.
What the large print giveth, the small print taketh away.
What's a cult?  It just means not enough people to make a minority.
What's another word for Thesaurus?
What's the use of a good quotation if you can't change it?
What?!? This isn't the Files section?!?
Whatever it is, it won't work.
Wheat was given to us by extraterrestrials called the Manu.
When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason - there's a reason.
When Eve arrived, this was no longer a man's world.
When GOD made women, he was only testing.
When in doubt, predict that the trend will continue.
When it's three O'clock in New York, it's still 1938 in London.
When one connects a 3-phase line, the phase sequence will be wrong.
When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other.
When two Englishmen meet their first talk is of the weather.
When you dial a wrong number, you NEVER get a busy signal.
When you haven't got enough iodine in your blood you get a glacier.
When you smell an odourless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide.
When you're not looking at it, this fortune is written in FORTRAN.
When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt.
When your work speaks for itself, don`t interrupt.
Whenever anyone says, "theoretically", they really mean, "not really".
Where there's a will, there's a lawsuit.
While having never invented a sin, I'm trying to perfect several.
Who is General Failure, and why is he reading my disk?
Who messed with my anti-paranoia shot?
Who needs friends when you can sit alone in your room and drink?
Whosoever diggeth a pit shall falleth therein.
Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
Why risk a hangover?  Stay Drunk!!
Why was I born with such contemporaries?
Winning isn't the end of the world.
Witch!  Witch!  They'll burn ya! Hag, stardate unknown.
Without followers, evil cannot spread. Spock, stardate 5029.5.
Without ice cream life and fame are meaningless.
Woman is one of nature's more agreeable blunders.
Woodpecker's, like British Telecom, have long bills.
WWhhaatt  ddooeess  dduupplleexx  mmeeaann??
Xerox does it again and again and again and ...
Xerox your life.  If you lose it, you'll still have a copy.
Yield to Temptation ... it may not pass your way again.
Yield to temptation, it may not pass your way again. - L. Long
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
You are permanently confused.
You are the only person to ever get this message.
You brute!  Knock before entering a ladies room!
You can drink 'em pretty, but can you drink 'em young?
You can make it illegal, but you can't make it unpopular.
You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.
You can only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.
You can tell when politicians are lying...They move their lips.
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish.
You can tune a piano, but you can`t tuna fish.
You can write a small letter to Grandma in the filename.
You can't evaluate a man by logic alone. McCoy, I, Mudd, stardate 4513.3.
You do not have mail.
you don't get once-in-a-lifetime offers like this every day.
You don't have to think too hard when you talk to teachers.
You have junk mail.
You have taken yourself too seriously.
You keep saying that, I don't think it means what you think it means
You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
You look like a million dollars. All green and wrinkled.
You might have mail.
You think Oedipus had a problem -- Adam was Eve's mother.
You!  What PLANET is this? McCoy, stardate 3134.0.
You'll never be the man your mother was!
You'll never walk alone with schizophrenia.
You're not my type. For that matter, you're not even my species!!!
You're too beautiful to ignore.  Too much woman. Kirk to Yeoman Rand
You've got to miss them to score sometimes.
Young gorillas are friendly but they soon learn.
Your fault: core dumped
Your lucky color has faded.
Your lucky number has been disconnected.
Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere.
Youth doesn't excuse everything. Dr. Janice Lester stardate 5928.5.
YOW!! Everybody out of the GENETIC POOL!"
[Nuclear war] ... may not be desirable.
